{"id":681,"date":"2014-03-27T12:50:14","date_gmt":"2014-03-27T18:50:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/oneyearnovel.wpengine.com\/?p=681"},"modified":"2022-11-15T20:13:12","modified_gmt":"2022-11-16T02:13:12","slug":"parent-or-patron-how-to-find-the-balance","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/clearwaterpress.com\/oneyearnovel\/blog\/parent-or-patron-how-to-find-the-balance\/","title":{"rendered":"Parent or Patron? – How to Find the Balance"},"content":{"rendered":"

Guest post by Jeff Miller<\/em><\/p>\n

This week we get to hear from a writer who is also dad to a young writer<\/strong> who uses The One Year Adventure Novel<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Today\u2019s young writers face so many distractions and pressures.<\/strong> No matter their age, they deal with not only their everyday responsibilities, but also a sometimes overwhelming array of distractions<\/strong> constantly vying for their attention. As their parents<\/strong>, it is part of our <\/i>responsibility to help our children find balance, learn self-discipline, and instill a good work ethic. But how do we do this?<\/strong><\/p>\n

I am a parent and<\/i> a writer, and I know the fight against distraction intimately.<\/strong> Even as I readily agreed to write up this second guest post, I thought, \u201cCan I pull it off?\u201d You see, like most other writers, my time and attention are sometimes spread a bit thin.<\/p>\n

\"The<\/a>

Jeff’s fantasy novel, published under the name “J. Mark Miller”<\/p><\/div>\n

I don\u2019t say this to publicly bemoan my situation. On the contrary, I\u2019m happier and more fulfilled with life than at any other time. The reason I bring it up is, well, that\u2019s how life goes. I am constantly learning to navigate this sea of distraction, both as a writer and as the parent of a writer<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Good navigating comes down to striking the balance between being our child\u2019s parent and their patron<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Have you ever seen the movie Amadeus?<\/em> Though not a completely accurate portrayal of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, it\u2019s an interesting study of human nature and artistic genius<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Mozart makes his first appearance on screen under the patronage of the Prince-Archbishop of Salzburg. His amazing talent is evident, as well as his less-than-savory character. He\u2019s soon revealed to be prideful and petulant\u2014a man-child who has yet to grow up; and it seems as if he never will<\/strong>. His antics leave the movie\u2019s other main character, Antonio Salieri, wondering why God would choose to bestow such gifts upon a soused popinjay<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

\"Amadeus<\/a>We learn that Mozart is in reality a tortured soul. When his father, Leopold, dies, Mozart is not only consumed with grief, but also haunted by his father\u2019s specter<\/strong>. Leopold was a harsh taskmaster, a strict disciplinarian who drove Mozart to excel no matter the cost<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

The remainder of the movie portrays a life spiraling out of control<\/strong>. Mozart\u2019s finances are in shambles, his marriage is in turmoil, and his health is broken. In the end, Mozart dies, a victim of his own choices,<\/strong> and is buried in a pauper\u2019s grave.<\/p>\n

What was to blame for Mozart\u2019s destruction?<\/strong> Surely, he made his own choices; but a study of his life as portrayed in the movie suggests some answers.<\/p>\n

Though Mozart was an adult by the time he appears on screen, he thinks and acts like a spoiled child. It seems that many of his self-destructive behaviors stemmed from rebellion toward his overbearing father<\/strong>. In turn, there is also an element of indulgence<\/strong> not only on the part of Mozart himself, but also from the authority figures in his life. Perhaps, just perhaps, if his father had been more of a patron, and his patrons more like a father, Mozart might have lived a longer and less tragic life.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019m sure almost every parent struggles to keep the balance between nurture and discipline<\/strong>. None of us intentionally set out to raise either a spoiled brat or a mindless automaton.<\/strong> When it comes to having a child passionately involved in something we may not personally grasp<\/strong>\u2014such as writing\u2014the struggle to know how to be both<\/em> parent and patron is all the more difficult.<\/p>\n

Here are a few suggestions from the viewpoint of someone who is both a writer and the parent<\/strong> of a writer to help you successfully wear both hats.<\/p>\n